Curl Talk – Heart to Heart, Hair to Hair

I love getting my hair cut, trimmed, styled . . . brushed even. However, I do not love getting that weighty stare as the hairdresser sees what he has to work with: true, natural, God-given curly hair.

Excuse me for my unfortunate genetic schematics. When I was born, I had no intention of offending you. Honest. Scout’s honor (though that might not have much clout; I was only a girl scout for a year).

Personally, I’ve come to terms with my frizzy, dizzy, busy, curly hair. It’s a nest of knots and kinks and last night’s meals . . . plural. But, whatever! YOLO, am I right? Did I do that right? I don’t think I did that right; can I try again? Peking duck you! No. I don’t think that’s right either. I’m so sorry. Anyway . . .

. . . I got a new haircut! OK, it’s not so much new as it is the same haircut I always ask for, but regardless . . . I wish there was a place where I didn’t have to feel apologetic from entrance to exit. Sadly, I keep going to the same place, so it’s warranted that I get the same reaction each time. Shame on me.

I’m pretty sure other people haven’t had this problem, so let me share my experiences.

He gestures to a chair and offers me a seat. A cape is draped, unflatteringly, around my neck. We are ready to commence the cutting!

I watch my hairdresser through the mirror. I am all eyes, and they’re all watching you, buddy. Every. Last. One. So of course I notice how he sighs heavily and quickly glances at me with every curl he picks up before straightening it. OK, hairdresser, that’s a little unnecessary and a tad overdramatic don’t you think? It’s hair! It’s not a 2 ton truck. Truck you! No. No, I don’t mean that.

If I could cower without getting the worst haircut of my life, I would. But I sit still and proper. And I smile. I smile at him every chance I get. That’s nice, right?? Because I know. God, I know. My hair is curly. I have curly hair. You don’t have to look at me like I’m to blame and like I don’t deal with it every day. I know! It’s a son of a . . . glitch.

So, he always straightens my hair like he’s doing me a favor. Hey, friend, I’m the one doing you a favor. I’m giving you business and paying for a tiny percentage of your rent/groceries/life, you choose.

And every time he’s done I can physically see the relief enter his body as I leave his chair. I can almost see the thought bubbles popping out of his head: Done! Got that one knocked out of the way. Good riddance–glad I won’t have to see her for another 3-6 months

Seriously, I just wish there was a place where I didn’t have to feel immeasurably sorry for whatever I call an excuse growing from my scalp. Because a) I’m not sorry.

There’s no b, just a. I’m not sorry for my curly hair. And even though my hair is the one that’s in ringlets, maybe you’re the one who needs to take a chill pill and unwind.

On that note, my hair is still long and it’s OK. I’m getting a little bored of the same ol’ same ol’. Gotta figure out a new style next time. Gotta flatten out the details, am I right?? Did you see what I did there? It’s wordplay . . . I have curly hair . . . my hairdresser always uses a flat iron . . . I’m here all week.

Cheers!

L.

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9 thoughts on “Curl Talk – Heart to Heart, Hair to Hair

  1. I have curly hair too! To this day I have only found two hairdressers that knew what they were doing (out of 3 different cities), truly, with curly hair. To top it off, I have crazy thick hair –I often get a look of relief when I say, “I don’t want it straightened.”

    • How do you normally get yours cut?? Because mine is really thick too! I keep going to the same hairdresser because he’s the only one who doesn’t chop it all off (I actually really like him despite his flustered facial features whenever I walk in). I tell him an inch, he takes off an inch . . . not a yard. My hair isn’t really ringlets like Orphan Annie, it’s definitely banana curly (does that make sense?), but I never know how to get it cut so that it doesn’t triangle.

      Woe to the woman whose waves are as ferocious as the lion and whose locks are as untamable as the Weasley twins.

      • They have to cut the layers just right and the length can’t be too short –I have no idea how they do it, haha. I’ve gotten those triangle cuts before too, *sigh*. They’re the worst! I once got my hair “thinned” and while it looked nice while straight, it looked terrible curly –and then when my hair grew out some it REALLY looked awful.

  2. I’m late to the conversation, but had to chime in. I hated my curly hair and dreaded getting it cut (triangle hair!) until I found Ouidad. She has curly hair, wanted a good cut, decided she had to do it herself, and has trained a bunch of people around the county. To start with, they cut hair dry or damp, so they work with your curls! Seriously, the cuts (and products) have changed my relationship with my hair! Check it out… Ouidad.com

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