As a child, I was so sweet. So shy. So good.
I was never any trouble, never got into any trouble–I was pretty easy to handle.
I’m the youngest of three (the only girl). My brothers were kind of rambunctious as kids–always roughhousing and “playing” wrestling, like WWF, with each other.
I played make believe in my room.
I read a lot of books and watched a lot of kid shows too, though. I never really got in anybody’s way, but somehow I always seemed to get on my brothers’ bad side. Or maybe that’s just how they loved me . . . yea, let’s say that.
I would be the unfortunate victim of farts in the face, getting sat on, or sometimes both at the same time.
It was not a good time to be a little girl.
One day, after school (for them, not me. I wasn’t even in kindergarten yet) one of my brothers came home with his friend. I was watching the classic tv sitcom, Barney and Friends (just kidding–it’s not a sitcom).
Well, my brother and his friend dropped off their backpacks and began to play with the nerf guns. They were shooting at each other. Shooting at targets. Shooting windows.
But I guess that got boring fast.
I’m not sure what happened, but it was all such a flurry. The next thing I knew, I was getting bombarded by orange and yellow nerf pellets!
Being a girl, I did the only thing I knew how: I ran.
But I was, like, four years old at the time–I was not that bright. I ran downstairs into our den. I should have ran to my mother.
I was trapped. There was no way out.
Eventually, I climbed on top of the couch and was pinned against the wall–nerf pellets bouncing off my legs, my face. These boys were relentless. In my mind they each had a nerf gun in both hands and were firing at me with their machine guns, like they were some type of mafioso in a black and white film.
In reality, they were two little boys pumping their nerf guns at a defenseless little girl.
I’m not entirely certain of how it ended. But it did. Probably because they ran out of nerf ammo.
We still have that couch in our den, 20 years later. Luckily for me, I survived the ambush to tell this tale. What’s the moral of the story? I’m not sure there is one.
Nerf guns–make sure you have an extra supply of nerf bullets.